What follows is my own creative adaptation of C.S. Lewis’ classic work, “The Screwtape Letters”. The idea of writing these diabolical letters was Lewis’ but the thoughts contained here are my own.
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My dear Wormwood,
It seems that after your last debacle that the powers that be decided to give you an easier assignment. Rather than feeding you to me, that is. Don’t mistake this for mercy! That phenomenon or the weak has no place in our lord’s kingdom. You can rest assured that the only reason why you are not deep down in my (regrettably empty) belly is because someone thinks you may yet have some usefulness left in you. We shall see.
Anyway, you have been reassigned. The ease of this assignment should shame you, for you have been assigned to an academic. An academic theologian to be more precise. You are being handed a soul on a silver platter! This place is already ripe with them.
What makes the academic theologian such an easy assignment is how blissfully unaware they are. For all their talk of the soul (isn’t it adorable how they keep calling it the nous?) they become delightfully unaware that they even have one that needs tending. This is why our people worked so hard at developing the concept called “abstraction”! The more they talk, for example, of the nous as an abstract concept, the easier it is for us to keep them from making the connection between their concept and the concrete reality of the soul that they themselves possess. The more we keep them in abstractions, the easier our task shall be.
There is one pesky thing, though, that academics are especially prone to think about. This one thing has the potential to undo all of our hard work. And that is beauty. Academics love to talk about beauty. And as long as it remains mere talk (“idle chatter” as the Enemy’s book calls it), we have nothing to fear. But the dangerous thing about beauty is that it refuses to remain an abstraction. Talk of abstract concept of beauty quickly – too quickly – turns to the consideration of particular things that are beautiful. Even academics (dense and dull though they are) recognize that beauty is meant to be embodied. (Even the mere writing of that word turns my [pitifully empty] stomach! What an insipid and vomitous notion!).
There is a lot more at stake here than may first appear. For, though their human culture doesn’t realize it, the academic world still bears remarkable influence on the world outside of its ivory towers. We know this well. You recall those fools who taught our Father’s great idea: deconstructionalism? That “merely academic” topic filtered its way quite nicely into what the sociologists called “the popular imagination.” So the academics are remarkably influential, which is why our people worked so hard to corrupt their realm. (We should be grateful for the 19th century for assisting our efforts on this so well).
Back then to my warning to you about beauty. You see, my precious Wormwood, if the academic (I shall refrain from referring to him as a “human” for obvious reasons) ponders beauty for too long, he will come to see the absolute necessity of its embodiment. And this just plays into the Enemy’s hands – he, after all, was the one who came up with that most filthy and disgusting of ideas – becoming one of them. Can you think of anything more revolting? Dear Wormwood, I know that I cannot. But do you not see how beauty may play immediately into the Enemy’s hands? The last thing we want is a human lot who see through the antagonistic dichotomy between flesh and spirit that we posit to their minds. We have always had great success with those who call themselves, rather ironically, Gnostics. The very last thing we want is academics, or anyone really, taking the Enemy’s embodiment seriously. As long as we can keep them Gnostics, thinking the Enemy hates the body (one of the greatest of all the lies our Father Below has devised!) we shall have them won.
This is why beauty poses such a threat to our task, my dear Wormwood. But rest assured that there are plenty of ways around this danger. The best course of action is to keep beauty an abstraction. The best way to do this is to create controversy over definition. We both know how academics swarm to that kind of controversy. They love to spend so much time debating what a term means that they never move past it. This was one of my most successful strategies in my younger days. Slobglob, on the other hand, succeeded with the opposite tactic in non-academic circles: using words without ever considering their meaning. How deliciously simple it is to lead these humans to error through the excess of the so-called good. (We hate them because they are the harmony of spirit and animal, so it is only right that we push them to elevate one side over the other. Our people hate beauty and so we hate harmony all the more!)
If we cannot boggle their contemplation of beauty by debate over definition, then we must labor to make beauty more a matter of taste than of truth. This has become relatively easy for us lately, again thanks to the 19th century. Our work there amongst the philosophers (you must watch out for some of them) had this delicious result: we destroyed the harmony between subject and object. A great success! Now the humans give priority to their own subjectivity over the object. We brought them to the point where they define something as beautiful when they experience it as beautiful. (To be certain, the advent of what is called “pop music” went a long way to helping us here). What is important to them is not the “truth” of the object but “my own personal experience” of the object. Beauty becomes a matter of individual taste (and this can lead us right back into the purely conceptual squabbles over definition). And of course, as the saying goes, there is no accounting for taste. If we can succeed in making beauty an issue of taste, then it makes no demand upon them; beauty just becomes an experience or, even better, a form of entertainment.
As long as we can successfully keep beauty in the realm of taste, we needn’t worry about the embodiment to which beauty leads. Because the threat of beauty is that it points to the embodiment of the Enemy. But there is nothing, ah, “aesthetically pleasing” about that embodiment. No one, least of all an academic, would have the taste for that ugly, bloody, dead man. The “incarnation”, as the Enemy’s thinkers have called it, is in poor taste indeed.
So, my dear Wormwood, I wish you luck in your new assignment (by which, I hope you understand, I mean that I wish you no luck whatsoever – you see, my love, I am dreadfully hungry). Nevertheless, I do offer you sound advice in the hopes that, when you fail (as I am certain you will) the authorities will reward me with you upon news of your perpetual incompetence. No offense, of course, dear nephew. I simply know how you are. I trust you’ll pardon me for being so incisive about your character. Not to mention that consuming you would be, ah, truly beautiful.
Your affectionate uncle,
Screwtape


